Victim blamingSexual scoring
She shouldn't have been drinking that much. What did she think was going to happen?Wait. She was wasted. There's no way she was in a position to give consent to any type of sexual activity. That's seriously not ok.
No. Sexual assault is sexual assault. All assaults should be taken seriously and victims should be treated respect no matter whether they were drinking, what they were wearing, their sexual history, or their previous relationship with their assailant(s).Yes. There's something about the idea that this person was drinking that makes me feel like *maybe* they could have avoided the assault if they just hadn't been drinking.
Gross. Anybody can be a victim OR a perpetrator of sexual violence. The only thing that should matter in determining whether a sexual act was an assault or not is whether it was consensual.I've never really thought about it. I can see how comments like that about high-profile cases can end up really hurting the survivors who might be listening and start to think that they somehow 'deserved' their assault or won't be believed.
I want that person to know that they aren't alone, that there are people who support them, and that they will get through this.I don't want to assume that the person accused is guilty without knowing for sure. But I guess that's really not the most important thing in this moment. I'm still not sure what happened so I don't know that I should support this victim yet.
No, I haven't.Well, honestly ... yes.
Yes – I've felt that pressure.No, I haven't really felt that pressure myself. But I think I know what you mean.
I've exaggerated it.I've underplayed it.
There's a certain amount of pressure, almost like a competition, to have a lot of sex. I didn't want to be the butt of jokes or judged for being a prude or a loser.I don't fit all the cliches about 'hookup culture' on campus, or ideas about what sex is 'supposed' to look like, and I've exaggerated to avoid being seen as an outsider.
I didn't want to be seen as a 'player' or a 'slut.' People make assumptions about people who have lots of sex, and I don't want to be associated with that.I feel like there's an element of competition around how much sex people are having, and I'm not into it.
Culture. I feel pressure to fit into norms around sex that are pushed in TV shows, song lyrics, by my friends and peers, and even parents/relatives.Myself–I think I’ve kind of internalized the idea that the amount of sex I’ve had in some ways defines who I am as a person.
Yes. That assumption is everywhere: TV, song lyrics, comments made by friends, parents and others.I like to think that we've moved past this. But I think sometimes – and to some people – this stereotype persists.
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